Customers often ask how we count your nine lives. The answer is carefully. Each policy begins with nine, valued by our Chief Actuary at $11,400 apiece, and each is reduced by an Event, which we define as anything requiring a vet, a ladder, or a phone call to the fire brigade. As of this month, the average insured cat has 7.2 lives remaining.
Please note that a life lost is not a life gone: lives lost before 1 January may be carried over to next year at a discounted rate. We recommend that you not inquire about the tenth life. It exists in our records only as a rumour, and the rumour is not covered. Sleep well. We have counted you twice.
Leave a Reply