Your annual statement will arrive this month in a pale blue envelope. Please do not be alarmed by its weight. It contains fourteen pages, of which eleven are definitions. Page one lists your premium, page two your claims, and page three the Cat’s Paw Ratio, which is a number our actuaries use to assess how likely you are to do it again.
If anything in the statement appears incorrect, you have 21 days to tell us, in writing, using a pen, which we recognise is difficult. For customers without opposable thumbs, our Branch Manager Fiona Larkspur will accept a single paw print on the reverse of page nine, beside the box marked “agreed.” Please do not sign the box marked “disputed” unless you are sure. It is smaller, and rather hard to undo.
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